Bobby’s Tacos - It’s About The Taconomics
If you read my blog about Bobby’s brunch, you’ll know that their brunch is out of this world delicious and I am a big fan. You might also know that I am not afraid of participating in some taco bashing! Over priced, unsubstantial……blah blah blah. Go read it……..
Well, I am never scared of proving myself wrong so I finally bit the bullet and went to Bobby’s for the tacos!
As most people from our town would know, Bobby’s is part of arguably the coolest cafe/bar/restaurant family in Shrewsbury. With the sourdough pizza slinging Dough & Oil and cocktail and craft beer gluggin Oil as older siblings, there is an expectation (almost a requirement) of effortless cool. Trendy, good vibes, good flavours, it’s had some big shoes to fill, shoes in the form of tacos in this case.
It’s almost frustrating how effortlessly cool these places are. From the food and drink to the staff - always on brand, always cool! These are the kind of places that usually set off my innate and uncontrollable requirement to hate things popular and mainstream. I struggle to even play by my own rules! Which is perfect, because my rules tell me that I don’t rate tacos, but there’s that thing in me desperate to even prove myself wrong. This could easily end in an existential crisis! WHO THE BLOODY HELL AM I?.......
While maintaining maximum cool, these places also manage to be incredibly welcoming. Even that is so cool! It doesn't matter what age you are, what music you listen to or whatever your weird quirks and hobbies are. They have an ability to put you at ease and make you feel like you're very much part of the cool crowd. Inclusivity is definitely the cool crowd and I’m all for it! It almost gives me the confidence to test the cool waters by dipping my guilty pleasure toes and revealing my love for the soundtrack to Hairspray The Musical and Fascination by Alphabeat……WHO’S WITH ME?.......
Of course Bobby’s has a bar to sit at. Every cool place does! If there is ever an option wherever you are, always choose the bar! The staff are just as laid back yet attentive as before. It’s lunch time so we toy with the idea of a lunch time jalarita but then soon realise we have the school run to do - we’ll stick to the pink water!......and a non-acoholic cocktail…..both to die for!
I always adore a small menu. I’ve said it a million times before, it’s confidence, it’s being ok with your identity. Dare I say it, it's the cool thing to do! It also helps my indecisiveness when it comes to trying to pick the coolest thing on the menu. A choice of 4 tacos, a burrito, some sides and some chilli and chips to choose from. Perfect.
These aren’t school canteen or chippy chips by the way, it makes total sense that they are tortilla chips. Definitely not something we would mistake and appear uncool with……defintely didn’t happen……
We went for the guacamole, black beans and a couple of taco variants to share. It seemed like a big order but determined to prove myself wrong, we weren’t going to take any chances.
Freshly fried tortilla chips! It’s a bit like making your own corn tortillas for the tacos (which is also what they do here). It’s just that little process and bit of extra effort that makes everything a million times better. These are dusted with some lovely spices. I think it must be Tajin but I can’t be sure and quite frankly it just doesn't matter - they are delicious.
If you ask me, there is a lot of lazy guacamole out there. (I am noting Lazy Guacamole down on my ever expanding list of band names) Pop the green flesh into a food processor and blend it until you get something that might make you wonder if the Incredible Hulk has a severe gluten intolerance. 9 times out of 10 it’s also seasoned to death. Too acidic, too salty, it takes away from all the rich creaminess of an avocado. Such a waste of avocado - totally devastating considering the environmental impact the avocado trade has!........I’ve slapped myself on the wrist, I wasn’t supposed to drag this down with doom and gloom!
Bobby’s guacamole (another great band) is fresh, textured and really nicely seasoned - which makes it light, creamy and super avocado-y! It arrives topped with loads of exciting tasty things and in a small mortar, one half of my rap duo Pestle & Mortar. This looks great but it’s not without its issues. Its main problem is getting past this curmudgeonly, fun sponge of an old man. As my years have gone by I am slowly viewing the world from a much more functional point of view. Aesthetics are falling by the wayside. This very cool way of serving guacamole in a beautifully round, beautiful mortar is fantastic until you are left with one tortilla and the scrapings of the guacamole. Super crisp, large, unrelenting, delicious triangle vs unrelenting, marble round surface. It becomes a little like that bit in Apollo 13 when they are trying to make the round thing fit in the square thing? What's that saying about square pegs and round holes? Or is it round pegs and square holes? Or is it round pestles and square mortars? Or is it triangular chips and round mortars? Anyway, this is largely irrelevant, I have my man made cutlery attached to my palms and my kids aren't with us so there’s no risk of feeling hypocritical when I quite literally finger the guacamole. It deserves a good fingering - it’s bloody delicious!
The food did take a bit of time to come out but I am getting less and less fussed by this. Good company, nowhere to be and fresh food - it should take its time.
They have goat on the menu - I will forever order goat. Anywhere. Wherever I am, if there is goat, you'll be sure to see me eating it. We really wanted the battered cod but the gluten police were out again so we went with the super exciting veggie option which was halloumi and onions in 3 ways - roast, fried and pickled.
I expected the star of the show to be the tacos, naturally you would. But what blew me away straight away was how delicious the black beans were. My god - keep those coming for an eternity! Rich and indulgent but light at the same time and the crumbled feta was everything they needed. We both tried our hardest not to just devour those before moving on!
Three tacos on each tray arrived plentifully stacked and with a little pot/bowl of rice and some yummy how sauce. The rice looks tomato-y. It tastes a bit bland if I’m honest. It reminds me quite a lot of Uncle Ben’s microwavable pouches in its texture and flavour but it’s still good to have on the side and definitely puts my mind at ease that this is going to be too much food for us! The rice felt a little like an after thought but then it should be. We’re here for the tacos, who really cares about the rice?
I dived into the goat tacos before my wife had even had a chance to take a look at what's in front of us, let alone think about the rice.
My first bite was pretty aggressive. Not quite half the taco gone in a flash. Is this my problem? It’s not the tacos, is it me? Am I the problem? These are the kind of internal discussions I quickly shut down with a resounding ‘No’ - mostly so there’s no chance of me discovering the real truth and no chance of that existential crisis rearing its head again.
My mind turned to taco economics - or taconomics and my pesky internal battle with the substantiality of tacos. A more reasonable first bite and it becomes a comfortable 3 bites per taco. That's 9 bites per dish (I’m pushing the rice to one side, that doesn't count….yet). So that’s £1.44 per bite.
We have to bear in mind that we are sharing. 9 bites is awkward. How do you share 9 bites? Especially when I will require (at least) an exact 50:50 split for the goat. However delicious the onion and halloumi was (and it was), it wasn’t a patch on that goat - soft, tender, warming. Beautifully spiced - really enjoyable.
Maybe it needs to be 4 smaller bites? That would give us an even share and would reduce our £/bite to an exhilarating £1.08 per bite. Hmmm. That sets my competitive mind a target of achieving less than £1 per bite. That would be nice, but unachievable - I would largely be eating air with at least 2 bites - false economy taconomy.
My first bite, somewhat akin to a blue whale swallowing plankton suggested 2 bites is a possibility. But would my far more delicate eating wife be able to keep up with that? Not to mention the hefty £2.17 per bite I would be forking out for. I tried it when my wife wasn't looking - it was too much, even for a gob like mine.
Watching my wife delicately, slowly and enjoyably eat makes me realise that this is total nonsense anyway. I eat like a pig, there is every chance that all of this is entirely on me and my greed! She has to be working to the same taconomics as me, or it’s all pointless and risks my requirement for at least a 50:50 share of the goat.
No one is working on the same food economics as me - I know that. It’s been the same for 40 years. What I should have done was to take a large bite out of all 6 tacos in front of us, put them back on the plates and completely distort my wife's idea of how big they were in the first place. That would be a plan apart from she’s patrolling the tacos like a lioness protecting her prey - she’s onto me before I even start!
Then it all becomes apparent. Tacos are delicious. There is no debating that. I have never said tacos are not delicious! And these tacos are particularly delicious! Both of them! They are really really good. The onions 3 ways add great flavour, texture and in my own uncool little world, they are super fun! The goat I’ve previously mentioned. It’s just great!
My issues with tacos are nothing to do with size or substance but more about how utterly delicious they are. I have a delicious switch in my digestive system. Anything delicious and it switches off all regulating systems. You know that feeling of eating enough? Of being satisfied? That feeling of being stuffed? When something is truly delicious I can’t feel that. I go into a state of panicked eating, determined to continue engulfing everything around me. An unstoppable eating force that will never be satiated. Like I’m on Matthew Kelly’s You Bet in the 90s, taco eating is my game and Bob Carolgees is supporting me! He thinks I can do it! I won’t let you down Bob! The kids at Banardos are depending on us!
When I’m surrounded by something delicious and it ends, there’s a real sadness there. I don’t like it! There’s a real sadness when these tacos end and I really don’t like that! It will never matter how much I’ve eaten. This is the basis of the taconomics. How can I prolong the enjoyment, make it last longer. Smaller bites mean more but less meaningful bites. It lasts longer but it’s less satisfying. Will that help? No! I hide it behind a £/bite philosophy when really it should be a dopamine/bite system - problem being there is only one way to go in that taconomy for this dopamine junky - Down in one!......ooooor order 2 trays of tacos just for me!
And there it is! We’ve solved the problem. It is me, it’s my greed. The only problem the tacos have at Bobby’s is that they’re too delicious. A problem none of us need to worry about solving!
I urge you to go to Bobby’s, feel cool and sit at the bar! Neck the pink life giving hibiscus water, order a jalapeno margherita regardless of the school run, order tacos (maybe even 2 lots), order the guacamole, give it a good fingering and finally order some black beans each! Then just stuff your face! Order more than you think you’ll manage, it’s too delicious not to!
It’s worth it!
